Wednesday, March 04, 2015

On Being (Still) Single

I have some thoughts on singleness that I have been ruminating on lately. I've had a lot of time to reflect upon being single because I am still single, much to the chagrin of the people who know me and have been praying these many years for me. And while I haven't seen the fulfillment of their pleas in the form of a husband, I have seen answers in the form of an all-encompassing peace in my status. It is not where I had ever thought I'd be at this age, but it's far from the visions I'd once had of being an old-maid. Perhaps the greatest gift I've received from remaining single is the knowledge that God can redeem anything for His purposes (singleness or marriage!), and that whatever His ultimate plan for my life may involve (I must confess that I do hope it will involve marriage), I know that He gives me grace for each and every day, that He fulfills me far more than any husband ever could, and that He is not a predicable God, but one who orders this world in ways that we cannot think or imagine. He calls some to marriage, some to singleness, and some to temporary singleness before marriage. The thing I've had to learn to accept is that I can never know God's will in advance and can only live within the day that He gives me. I can't know the next minute or hour or day. I may be married next year. Then again, I may still be single. I can only rest in the knowledge that whatever the future holds, I serve a God who loves me and orders my days according to His plans. I must believe (and I do believe) that those plans are nothing but good. If I remain single, it is good and God is still good. If I marry, it is good and God is still good. Because of this, I no longer have to fear not getting what I want, because God is changing me to want Him, and that is something I can never lose. One can lose singleness and one can lose marriage. But one can never lose God, because He has promised to never lose or forsake us.